I had a really, really, really hard time falling asleep last night. I couldn’t make my mind stop thinking . . . and it was driving me insane! The irritating thing is, it wasn’t about anything particularly stressful. A few homegroup girls and I are helping to throw a housewarming party for a friend. Somehow the planning got really complicated (thank you e-mail + my over-organizing tendency), and I was afraid I was making the other girls go crazy.
I talked to one girl this morning, and the party is scaled way back – yay! I’ve never been good at planning parties – at least not being in charge. They always feel so contrived.
Anyway, I’m glad that’s taken care of. However, the lack of sleep + night of “worrying” is leaving me susceptible to attack this morning. I’m feeling inadequate at all the things that matter in life. At least, all the things that matter to me – the roles I’ve been given. This food thing & my complete dysfunction when it comes to intimacy are stealing from my marriage. My inability to forgive is stealing from my friendship w/ MK. My desire to be a homemaker is stealing from my attitude at work. Ugh!
Anyway, I thought I’d throw it out there, Lord. I know you’ve promised good for me. Please help me to remember it.