February 23 was my re-initial weigh-in: 213.5 lbs. Today is July 18, and my weight is 210.3 lbs. The only redeeming thing about that is that the dates are at least within the same year.
But really, it’s just sad. And typical of me and this “journey” I’ve been on since beginning this blog.
Here’s what I’m doing about it:
What, a simple paper planner? Yup. I’m finally writing down everything I eat/drink/do re: exercise. I’m actually holding myself accountable. I’ve tried several different digital ways to do this, but none have stuck. Perhaps if I had internet access on my phone. . .but that’s something I’m quite content without. Actually, I prefer it. No way for me to have e-mails pull my attention away every 10 minutes, all day and night!
I’ll still update (and will have to adjust the format of) the Measurements page, of course. However, I’ll probably simplify it significantly. No more of the p90x worksheets – I know now that I’ll never update those digitally. I am considering adding more photos, though.
On the other, more emotional side of things, I’m using another (also green :-P) journal to practice thanksgiving. Silly as it may sound to have to practice it, I no longer have a naturally grateful outlook on life. I’ve spent so much time focusing on what I don’t have, and missing all of the amazing things God gives us as gifts daily. I’ve been reading One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp, and her practice of writing down blessings, of diving deep into “eucharisto,” is what I’m trying to emulate.
If you have a tendency to battle bitter thoughts throughout your days, try it. Read her book. It’s quite poetic. I’ve missed two days of thanks-recording so far, and I could really and truly tell a difference. My thoughts so quickly returned to the corrosive mental paths I’ve created over the past several years.
Anyway, just wanted to put that out there.